A Nothing's Happening Update

I really have nothing to update right now.  Sebastian e-mailed me on Thursday (June 3rd), just about a paragraph.  He asked what made me decide to leave teaching (since he's a teacher himself) and mentioned my trip to NYC.  He also told me not to worry about answering with deep, thoughtful responses because those could wait until we met up over milkshakes.  "...and when will that be exactly?" he teased at the end.

I dig it.  I like that he picked something other than drinks or coffee and I like that he suggested something at least somewhat specific and not a vague suggestion of getting together sometime.

I tried e-mailing him back that night, but I fell asleep on my couch instead.  Whoops!  So instead I started e-mailing him on Friday afternoon after I finished packing for the weekend in Busch Gardens.  I was almost done when Isabelle showed up at my house EARLY, so I made her watch some TeenNick while I hurried to finish because I knew that if I didn't finish then, I'd have to wait until Sunday--and I didn't want to wait three days from his e-mail to respond.  I didn't say anything very important in the e-mail, but I did tell him where I was going for the weekend and that we could talk about milkshakes when I got back.

Well, fast-forward to NINE days later and I still haven't heard anything!  I'm not pissed, especially because I waited longer than that to get back to him the first time, but come on!  I know that it's the end of the school year and it's a crazy time, but it's just an e-mail, dude.

At work on Thursday (June 10th), I walked past Ethan's desk on my way back to my agency and he put his phone call on hold just to tell me that we had to talk.  "Things have been getting CRAZY around here!"  I was intrigued and gestured for him to call me when he had a chance.  He did and apparently two different Navy officers asked him about me this morning.  One of them is a guy that he doesn't really socialize with, so it wasn't just an offhand question--he had to mention me on purpose.  He also might be stalking me--just kidding--because he's seen me leave with my "latina" co-worker in the evenings and mentioned this to Ethan.  That's only true every other week, so he can't have been paying attention for long--which makes him a terrible stalker or not a stalker at all.  Anyway, Ethan didn't give many details, but that one is apparently a tall Lieutenant Commander and I wonder if it's the one that I said hi to one morning when I caught him staring at me (I'm not that hot...it's just that I'm young and dress cutely and all the women that they see are in shapeless uniforms.  I win by default).

Anyway, a bunch of people from Ethan's office might be going to a Nationals game in about two weeks.  If that happens, he's going to invite me along and point out the guys that are "acceptable" and I can decide if I'm interested.  Even if I'm not, I'm down with being able to see Stephen Strasburg pitch and meet new people.  In the meantime, I'll have to step up my fashion choices.  No problem.

Ethan's Super Bowl Party

Because I had no idea how bad the roads were until I was already on them, I drove out to Maryland to Ethan's house for the first time.  As soon as I arrived, he greeted me and told me that Kenneth was there, but that he'd brought his fiancee, Ursula.  Ethan told me that he hadn't wanted to bring her, but that she had insisted.  No idea if that's true.

I saw Kenneth and was surprised at how much cuter he was than I remembered, but I just smiled and said hello.  He can be as cute as he wants, he's still engaged.  I met Ethan's wife, Olivia, and she was super friendly and nice...but not what I was expecting.  She's Puerto Rican, 43 (five years older than Ethan), and a mother of three.  She and Ethan have been married for four years and together for seven, and...I don't know.  She's just not what I pictured and I think that's kind of nice.  I mean, I think that it's clear that they love each other and that's good to see.

Then I met Ursula.  She's like a short version of Sarah Silverman, but not as thin--which isn't to say that she's fat because she isn't.  I was a little taken aback by her because I was standing in the basement, talking to Ethan, maybe, and she just popped out of nowhere to introduce herself to me.  There's nothing wrong with that, of course, but I felt like she had rushed over to do it and it just felt a little weird.  I mean, that could also be because I know so much about how no one wants her to marry Kenneth, including Kenneth, but whatever.  Honestly, there wasn't really anything wrong with her.  I noticed how she stuck close to Kenneth's side the entire night, but I don't think that she knew anyone other than him, Ethan, and Olivia.

I think that it was around halftime when Ethan and I were messing with the music that he told me how he had already gotten three text messages from Kenneth saying that I was hot.  So.  That's flattering, but it's also a jerk thing to do when he's ENGAGED.  I said something similar to Ethan and he said, "He is not marrying her.  Trust me, I'm his best friend, and it's not happening."

I talked to Kenneth a tiny bit because he was rooting for the Colts and I had to rib him a few times when the Saints did well, but mostly we only talked with Ursula and sometimes other guests.  Definitely no flirting or anything like that.  Still, Ethan called me on my way home and said that Kenneth had said some more things, but that he'd have to fill me in later.  He still hasn't!!!  I really want to know!


I know that Sophie already hates this guy, but I'd go on a date with him if he broke off the engagement first.  For the blog, if nothing more.  Come on...things have been slooooooow.

The Plot Thickens...Or Something

On Friday morning The Fourth walked up with me all the way to Ethan's office which is right by the swipe-access only doors for my office.  He knows people up there and went in to talk to them after Ethan saw us and said, "Oh, I want to talk to you two."

Oh, shit! I thought.  What's he going to say?  Is he going to say something about The Fourth and I as an US?!  Luckily, he wasn't that bad.  Instead of embarrassing me, he invited us both to his Super Bowl party.  I pretended like I hadn't been talking to him for a week about it already.  Anyway, he e-mailed me with the information and messaged The Fourth, though he said that he only did because he said that he would. Today he offered to send a reminder to him, but I told him not to bother.  I'm hoping that The Fourth doesn't come.  I mean, I don't know how many single guys will be at this thing, but I don't want to be stuck hanging out with one who isn't asking me out--that's a waste of time!

Back to Friday, though, I went back out to talk to Ethan after I had e-mailed him to assure him that I was coming to the party and to ask what I could bring.  During that time he had talked to Kenneth on the phone said that I was coming.  Kenneth got excited (whaaaa?!?!) and asked Ethan not to send an invitation to his home e-mail because he doesn't want the fiancee to come with him now.  Um?  Ethan told me a little bit more about the situation.  It seems as if the fiancee is the one who proposed and she started moving her stuff into Kenneth's place.  Now that they're living together, he's finding out a whole lot more about her, namely that her finances might be a mess.  If he's telling Ethan that they might be a mess, they are probably a BIG mess.  And even before he knew that I was going to be at the party, he told Ethan that he just needed to get out of his house (and away from the fiancee).

I still am not going there with the intention of home-wrecking.  I'm just going to have fun and hang out.  Even if Kenneth likes me, he's engaged and living with another woman.  And even if he breaks it off with her, I don't know that I want a guy with that kind of baggage.

Introspection

Once upon a time, Charlie broke up with me (in February) and I told Ethan about it.  He and I were already buddies, but it was my breakup that had us talking a lot more and it was all because of his friend Kenneth.  Apparently these two have been best friends for years and as soon as I was single, Ethan told me that he had to introduce me to Kenneth and a couple of weeks later he did.  Kenneth came by to have lunch with Ethan, so Ethan called me to come on out to the hallway if I was free.  I already knew that he might be coming by that day and I'd told my co-worker Norah about it, too.  So she saw him when she was walking back to our office from the bathroom and said that he was cute.  I went out and talked to him for several minutes and Ethan even left us alone--on purpose--before he came back and joined in again.  I dazzled Kenneth with my football knowledge and he told Ethan that I was cute as soon as they turned the corner away from me--according to Ethan.  I also thought that Kenneth was cute.

Drunk Texts and Winking

On Saturday night I was kind of delighted to see that The Fourth had texted me because he was away with his friends for the weekend and texting means that he was thinking about me. So even though it was late, I texted something quick back that he received the following morning.  I was half-awake when I got it and we texted back and forth a few times.

Fast forward to later in the afternoon.  He returned my last message from the morning and then we messaged a few times over the course of several hours.  He was drinking with his friends and informed me that he was drunk pretty early in the evening.  Then around 10:30 the texts got drunker and drunker and flirtier and flirtier.  I won't hurt your eyes or your heads by reposting them word-for-word because of all the misspellings.  In one seventeen word text, seven words were typed correctly; three of them were "it," "of," and "a."  Curiously another was "don't" and I have no idea how he got the apostrophe in there accurately.

Here is the information that I got from his texts:

-I have a hot and nice body
-Picking up "hot boys" at my parents' house isn't apparently weird (Okay, this one I'll explain.  I told him that I'd just driven home from my parents' and he asked if I brought home a hot boy.  I told him that my choices were my dad, my brother, or the dog...so, no, I didn't pick anyone up).
-I don't have to sleep with a boy if I bring him home
-If The Fourth came to visit, he wouldn't try to have sex with me
-I am hot enough to have sex with, but he wouldn't want to force me (Um, good?  Forced sex = rape, so I'm glad that he's taking that off the table)

Yesterday morning I texted him to say, "I hope that you're not too hungover this morning and that you have fun reading your sent texts from last night. :)"  I wanted him to know exactly what he'd been saying as soon as he woke up.  He texted back later that morning:


The Fourth (8:58am):  Hahahahahahaha boy. I had a thing for you last night!

Oh, come on, The Fourth!  You have a thing for me in general, not just Sunday night!  Whatever.  He e-mailed me to say something similar and to give a longer explanation.  I forwarded this stuff to Ethan who read it today.  He actually knows The Fourth!!  He doesn't know him well, but he knows him enough to like him and think that he's probably a good guy.  He also said that he seems "nerdy, but cool."  Sounds about right to me.

This morning I sat in The Fourth's office and talked to him for about ten minutes before I went upstairs.  I left when the co-worked that he shares his office with came in.  I said good bye to The Fourth and he said that he'd talk to me later...and then HE WINKED AT ME!  I know that isn't a big deal or anything, but it was so cute!  I was kind of smiling all day about it.

He still hasn't asked me out, though.

Because I Have To Come Out of Hiding

Okay...I've been MIA for the past week because I didn't want Sophie reading and judging me for what I've been doing--which is texting back and forth with The Fourth a lot.  I will reiterate that I am not leading him on!  He's really funny and we're finding more things in common.  I'm not in love with him or anything, but I'll be pleased if this goes anywhere.  And I think that he likes me, too, but he hasn't asked me out.  So...whatever.  I think that he's just waiting or something.

And he better not wait too long because I'm going to a party next Friday night and then Ethan is going to have a Super Bowl party the weekend after that.  This is so that he can finally introduce me to some of his friends...eligible friends, that is.  He asked me for a "shopping list" of what I'm looking for in a guy and if I had access to it right now, I'd post parts of it.  Even if I don't find The Guy there, at least I can maybe meet some new people and that'll be cool, too.

Once again.  Not leading The Fourth on.  Also, not being the one to suggest hanging out.  He needs to man up and do it himself if he wants to.  Oh!  Funny thing:  he texted me a few pictures after he left work.  One was of our building, showing that he was in the parking lot, one of him in front of his house, and the third was of a Corona.  Jerk.  :)

Less of a Tease?

I've successfully started backing off from The Fourth.  Pretty much by ignoring him, which makes me a terrible person, but I'm really doing it to save his feelings later.  On the night before New Years' Eve, he texted late to tell me to have a good time the following night; I thought that that was kind of weird because he'd have all the next day to do that.  I didn't respond because I was going to bed and...well, because I didn't want to respond.  The next morning on Facebook I saw that he had written on my wall that he wasn't going to work on NYE and that I should text him when I woke up.  I replied that he was lame (for not working) and that I'd try to text later, but that I didn't want to wake him up then--it was 5:30 in the morning.  But...I didn't text and didn't talk to him again until this morning when I came in to work...so four days.  He texted to wish me a happy New Year right after midnight on NYE, but I didn't respond to that, either.

Anyway, I think that this is good.  When I talked to him this morning, I was friendly but didn't flirt at all or mention guys or dating which could then lead into an unwanted conversation.  The most that I did was mention that I could wear my dress again when Dwight, Sophie, and I host a cocktail party later this month and told him that he should keep the date in mind for it.  I could have had the exact same conversation with anyone.  So...yay for me being less of a tease?

Talked to Ethan this morning about Nick; he said that I should wait until next week to go out with him because he took so long to call.  I might; this week is busier than next anyway.

OMG!

E-mailed Sophie and Ethan after the text messages to get their take. Not much to say except that Ethan (who has a female friend who is currently sleeping with a married political figure) was absolutely astounded by Kevin. That has to say something.

The Fourth and I texted a few times today, too. Nothing too interesting...just some joking around about the Kevin situation. We met up at 3pm to walk to our cars together and, as I mentioned to Sophie, I felt like I was in high school, planning to meet a boy to walk somewhere together. Anyway, I had fun talking to him as usual.

When I arrived at the eye doctor, I was a good twenty minutes early, so I tried going online with my cell phone. Since I don't have an iPhone or anything, this isn't super easy, fast, or reliable, so with about fifteen minutes before my appointment, I went inside. My heart was pounding with nerves...nerves that I'd tried to soothe in the car by saying out loud, "You are Lila Fucking Fowler." That is not my name, but that is what I actually said because Lila Fowler is effing awesome and I couldn't ask for a better role model before going in and facing Kevin.

I looked awesome and I knew it, which did help with my nerves a tiny bit. I went and checked in with the receptionist, saying hello to her and Kevin who was also right there. I was there less than a couple minutes before the receptionist got up and Kevin told me to check my phone. Dutifully, I did so and here is his text:

"So yes. I def have a crush. Tell you what I'm running to arlington after work to scan some film depending on how long that takes maybe we can meet up after...?"

Verbally, I said, "Maybe," but smiled at him. He went and got my sweet new Kate Spade glasses (that I'm never going to wear in public because I'm a contacts girl) and told me that they looked good on me...and that he liked my outfit. Well, yeah, you better, dude, because I look great.

I met with the eye doctor briefly and afterwards went and paid for my contacts. In the office alone, I had been berating myself for not actually saying any of the things that I'd planned to say to Kevin, so when he asked again about going somewhere tonight, I asked about his second car. He said that it was unreliable (then why do you have it?) and that he was borrowing his dad's. Okay. I can accept that.

I wasn't going to bring up the Twitter-girlfriend thing in front of his co-workers, but he wasn't following me out! I was kind of perplexed as to what I was supposed to do. He said again that he'd call me and I went to my car and pulled out of my parking space before I realized that he'd come outside. So I rolled down a window and he asked again if I thought I'd be free later tonight.

"Yeah, I am. Actually, there's something that I wanted to ask you about."

"Yeah?"

"I told my roommate about you and gave her your name...you know...because...well, anyway, she Googled you," I said apologetically.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, and she found your Twitter page." I checked his face for any kind of dawning revelation that he'd been caught, but he just continued to look at me expectantly.

"She said that it looked like you had a girlfriend....?" I said uncertainly. I realized later that I'd done a fair job not being accusatory...which is great and not something that I planned.

"Okay, I don't have a girlfriend," he said. "She might mean Mary? She's a photographer friend of mine who dates my friend Evan."

I asked if he was sure and acted like I mostly accepted this. Then I agreed that I'd go out tonight. Also, Mary is exactly who Sophie and I think is his girlfriend.

Dwight arrived at home at the same time I did; I was disappointed that Sophie wasn't there because I was dying to fill her in beyond the text messages that we were exchanging. Dwight seemed to think that maybe Kevin was telling the truth. I felt a little better, but still not trusting.

Chatting with some friends online, I briefly filled them in and sent the links to Kevin and Mary's Twitter pages. Then we discovered that he'd DELETED HIS TWITTER. He didn't make it private, he DELETED it. Sketchtastic.

Sophie called me on her way home and I started filling her in--midway, we were interrupted by Kevin calling. I was going to ignore it and call him back, but she insisted that I take it. He apologized for the weirdness earlier and said again that he definitely wasn't dating Mary and that they were just close friends and had been for a long time. I don't think that I believe him. Anyway, I still agreed to hang out tonight if we can make it happen. I said that I have to be in kind of early--between 9:30 and 10:00--because I need to get to work at about 5:30am tomorrow.

Sophie and I talked again until she got home and came downstairs to my living room. I showed her how his Twitter was gone and then we tried Facebook stalking. Now...I'd found his Facebook on the first night we met when I typed his e-mail address (that he'd given me) into the search and it returned his private account. I couldn't see anything but his name and photo and I didn't friend him, expecting that he might do that later. Today when I typed in his e-mail, nothing came up. That's right. HE DELETED HIS FACEBOOK.

If that's not creepy, I don't know what is. Dwight pointed out that Kevin could have just gotten really sketched out at Sophie stalking him. Maybe.

Anyway...the time is now 8:22pm and I just saw him sign on and off of Instant Messenger. I am invisible to him....But...he was supposed to call me about a half an hour ago to see if I still wanted to get together tonight. What am I supposed to think now?! Perhaps he realized that he just needs to cut his losses and get out now...hoping that I won't tell his girlfriend?

Stay tuned.

More Boys

I talked to Kevin for about six minutes on the phone last night. I was super tired from a 10 ½ hour work day and a lack of sleep and I wasn’t my normal cheery self—not that he knows what’s normal for me yet. He said that I sounded kind of out of it and asked if he could call me tonight. I said he could and didn’t mention that part of the reason why I sounded “out of it” was that I strongly suspected that he had a girlfriend and had lied to me about it. Anyway, after a talk this morning with my buddy Ethan, I’ve decided to let Jon keep pursuing me. Usually I jump into things too quickly, but this time I won’t because I don’t think that I can trust him. And if I ever want to end things or something, I can bring up the girlfriend thing.

I hope that I’m not starting down a slippery slope.

My buddy, The Fourth, so-called because of the IV at the end of his name, works in my building and we’ve struck up a friendship. I’m still not quite sure how he got my last name to friend me on Facebook a while back, but it could have been from my badge or from his father who works in the same agency as me. Even so, he and I get along really well together even though we only talk in the mornings when I pass by his office. His Facebook status update last night said that he’d had the worst day ever and something about nonspecific people driving him crazy. I commented that I know a guy like that who works in my building and is always saying “good morning” or “hello” and how that’s so annoying. He commented back that he knows that guy (himself) and thinks he’s the worst. So we continued to joke about how much we hate him and how he needs to be dropkicked. Then we chatted on Facebook chat; I’d never actually done this before because I’m always afraid this one guy will see that I’m on and message me.

Sure enough, while I cheered up The Fourth, Stalker guy (Dawson) messaged me, too. I met this guy at a club back in February, I think, right after Charlie and I broke up. This guy hunted me down on Facebook and often wrote on my wall and e-mailed me, creeping me out. I don’t like when guys come on strong and I definitely don’t like babies who are three years younger than me doing it. Anyway, I made polite-but-distant chitchat with him while The Fourth and I laughed it up. He’s a stellar guy (The Fourth) and I wouldn’t mind hanging out with him outside of work—as friends. Or maybe not even as just friends, but I think friends would be better…and safer.